Wednesday, June 28, 2006
lalal
What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sin he bears
You shall walk in raging waters, but you shall not...
well, i don't have perfect recall unlike many of you, but i found it strange that it unconsciously came to mind. when i'm in distress, often songs come from nowhere and confort me. praise the Lord.
Well...TAKE COMFORT AND DRAW STRENGTH FROM THE LORD. hope in His unending love.
Monday, June 26, 2006
what a friend i've found, closer than a brother
i have felt your touch, more intimate than lovers.
jesus, jesus, jesus
friend forever.
what a hope i've found, more faithful than a mother.
it would break my heart, to ever lose each other.
jesus, jesus, jesus
friend forever.
hello log. (:
i must say that this holidays have been very enjoyable, we got to see each other more often than usual. (: it felt like last years hols. so thank you for the very enjoyable time i had.
so anyway today i was thinking in school, looking at the faces around me and i realised how (quote poey) insignificant they were. like what's the point of having so many friends when ihave my community leaven of god to actually show me the love of god! (: yeah then i awfully missed you guys. haha just so you know.
it would break my heart, to ever lose each other
kris <3>
and god loves log *10000000000000000000000000000 more.
hello log (:
school's starting again.
and i must say while i was sitting there at the table at the reception after youth mass, i was thinking to myself..."when will i ever get to do this again"..and i just want to say that i really treasure all of you a lot. and i will miss you guys! as we all disappear to our busy lives once again.
just wanted to wish you all a happy school term ahead.
remember to pray.
and we all know that troubles [crosses] are going to come our way..
so continue to pray.
persevere...
and hopefully, soon enough i'll see ALL of you with smiley faces in sfx again. (:
i can't wait.
rice.
be not afraid
i go before you always
come follow me
and i will give you rest.
Sunday, June 25, 2006
every step i take i take in you!
hello everybody. i want to share. so you better damn well listen.
you know the whole youth mass thing. i admit i havent paid attention to it much la. its like whatever im a small part of it i dont really care. yeah. like one of those passing things that you're just made to do. then when i realised i had to do the sharing i was like f**k it. i just really didnt want to do it but theres no avoiding it since i agreed right.
so i wrote it on saturday morning and emailed it to jon. like a rushed one because i thought i just had to write one and didnt have to give and father would pick. but not the case. found out later i had to give the testimonial. was like. screw.
so during halftime between sweden and germany i trudged upstairs to rewrite it (keep in mind i was really DAMN BLOODY ANGRY THAT SWEDEN WERE LOSING). then before i did it, i sat down to pray. i prayed for a change of heart and the strength and courage to give the testimonial. then i realised i was in no position to be angry. im writing a testimonial for god im giving a testimonial for god so whats the bloody point if god isnt the centre of my heart and god isnt my purpose?! there was no reason to give a testimonial about god if all thats on your mind is "why do i have to do this shit" so my mind just relaxed. and i really prayed for god to work his words in my testimonial and maybe he did because i changed the words and i put more heart into it.
then went to church at 9+ right? then the spiritual prep ( which i thought was really good btw i want to affirm them for the prep ) completely changed me. you know how before public speaking you always nervous and your heart is pounding hard into your ribcage andyou know you're gonna screw up? well the testimonial i wrote wasnt testimonial-ish so i was kinda worried. but after spiritual prep i knew the spirit was in the room and i didnt feel the panic. i just felt really peaceful and happy and my teeny-angst was gone
even during mass before testimonial time i wasnt particularly worried. like i knew i couldnt go wrong. by the time i reached the pulpit my heart stopped pounding and i just gave the testimonial. i dont know if it was like magical but it doesnt matter because if it touched even one person then the testimonial was meant especially for him/her.
so whats the moral of the story? you cannot win against god. the odds are stacked. when god gives you a purpose to do his work, you either do it for god or not do it at all, damit.
so i want to thank god for his guidance. i know it wasnt a great testimonial or something but it helped me to realise something. if you really do it for god your heart will rejoice because the spirit is moving within you.
then in the evening for no reason i just started singing that every step i take i take in you song. and im not a really p&w singing kinda person. so its a sign! lets take every step with god purposefully deservedly and joyfully.
and im sorry for calling all of you insignificant. i meant in-significant. like. all of you are a part of significance. something like that yah. good luck for common tests.
<3 poey
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Friday, June 23, 2006
Stress is running high in many of us. i feel like i'm being torn apart by vhoosing what to do with my free time. well...all of us are feeling the strain.
tired. i'll like to sink my fingers onto the piano(guitar for many of you), drowning myself in music to escape the stresses. yet there's much to do.
imagination captures attention so easily. we would like to draw, create something new, our own.
well...take a break now
study tommorrow!!!! make sure you actually do it...
recharge or you'll burn out
in any case...don't spend he night without the appropriate amount of sleep
singing a lullaby
Thursday, June 22, 2006
it's this thing called log love that i miss.
it's a feeling that i get when i think about log.
log love.
log love to me, it's like a warmness.
it's like that hot mug of frappachino after getting caught in the rain.
it's like that reassuring hug you get when you feel alone.
it's in that prayer you know is being said for you when youre most down.
it's in that familiar smile you get when you go to church after a lousy day at school.
it's that hand that pulls you up when you have a fall.
it's that shoulder to cry on.
it's that feeling that makes you feel special at the end of the day.
my own fault that i havent been around much for log, been busy with my own stuff. yeah that i know and im sorry.
we'll all catch up as one big family again, im sure God has set aside some time for that.
i love you log people.
God loves you log.
and God loves each and every single one of you so much.
He told me to tell you all that.
anne.
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
9.10
Hi LoGgers~
It's half week before school starts again for some of us. When school starts, we'll be pretty much be busy again. What do you want to do with this time? 'cause we'll probably place school over Christ again. Plus, we need to study, prepare for the midyrs, ca, exams etc.
If you find it hard to study, say a silent, personal prayer whenever you're distracted. Make it short & simple.
Some times it's good to get out of old habbits. Take a leap of faith & persevere. thne you'll have found yourself change and grown a little.
when you're tired of studying move a little!
Struggles we go throuh seem alone, often not with friends or family. But the Lord walks each step of the time, & has the plan as Mark said. Never lose faith. Have HOPE! Christ is our hope, our light. Salvation will come to us. Many beutiful days are ahead.
Take care.
Monday, June 19, 2006
Hey guys. I played a tournament over the weekend, thats y I missed the session. I can only see yall on youth mass! Anyway, even though I didn't go to SFX on sunday, I went to IHM for 7am mass before rushing to my tournament. I was feeling very shit bout stuff and really life looked bleak and bland. I cannot deny that suicide crossed my mind countless times but of course it is not the right thing to do at all. So I was just walking to IHM.. I felt that i was walking faster, I had this urge to reach church as soon as possible and pray. I needed to talk to God. This internal struggle was really very unbearable and uncomfortable. So I reached church, knelt down and suddenly I did not know wad to say. But I felt myself calm down, that heavy stone in my heart disappeared and I was feeling at peace. So mass started, it was corpus christi. In the reading, it described how Jesus commanded the disciples to prepare the passover. He had the plan in place, he just needed the disciples to carry it out. The house was ready with couches and all. Then Jesus broke the bread and drank the wine as well as the disciples then prepare himself for his suffering. He knew wad was gonna happen to him, definately afraid but he prayed for the strength. My own problems cannot hold a candle to his at all. So why was I doubting God's plan? If I knew about it, I might strive to change it and it will be even worse. For quite some time, I have resigned to trusting in Him and really not asking to know the plan that He has for me. Then it was coming to communion, I suddenly had this feeling of weariness. Life hasn't made me tired, I caused myself to worry and guess and become depressed over things that don't go my way. Tears welled up and I think it happens too often nowadays but yes, He is there to guide and help me. After all, I did the session on Trust in God, and yet I am struggling to come to terms to that. After the mass I just stayed in church, didn't bother rushing. I wanted to talk to God. Thank Him for wad he has done. Thank Him for being there. I felt so much better and I know there's so much more to life..
praise God!
mark
Sunday, June 18, 2006
a priest once said
our lives are like a piece of patchwork.
while we are on earth, it looks like the back of the sewing. messed up and ugly.
but when we reach heaven,
just turn it around,
and you see a beautiful piece of art.
so persevere people.
our beautiful pieces of art are in the midst of creation.
rice.
HELLO!
after reading swee's post i just felt like blogging.
it's been a long time actually.
oh well. i don't know. i just think it's amazing how one single testimony of God's love can touch everyone. ok..it touched me deeply. and so praise God! (: it's just amazing to see God's love work a "miracle"[so to say] in someone's life..and then i suddenly look at my own life and realise. God has worked COUNTLESS. and i mean COUNTLESS miracles in my life.
quoting one of mark's blog post in 2005
"we should always remember to thank the Lord for everything we receive in our daily lives because waking up in the morning is also a miracle!"
says it all really.
and we are all united in God. united by Jesus Christ. and that's why i can look at us and say. there's nothing that's going to be too devastating for us to conquer.Jesus Christ lives in all of us! and so. there's nothing too devastating that we can't conquer also.
as i plunge into my past again.
reliving those moments when i just felt SO SO SO hopeless. when i felt that this life is dreadful. my life is just one big dreadful mess that i can't be bothered to live anymore...and then i look at myself now..with this joy that i can so clearly feel inside me..and it's a joy that no other thing can give..only God..and then i realise. that it was worth it. PAIN for a joy that can penetrate your whole soul..your subconscious..your everything..your whole body, mind and soul. and i know the pain was worth it.
i just look forward to the day that i can see smiles again as much as you.
LOG. we've come a long way. though i wasn't with you guys since the beginning...it's amazing..it's just like one year..or slightly more than that? and i feel like i've known you guys for so much longer. and i love you guys so deeply. because of the God i can see so clearly ever working in everyone of you.
praise God. (:
i don't know what to say.
i just really wanted to post all of a sudden.
and you know. it's amazing how many answers you can find when you go for mass.
really. i didn't realise it until i thought about it. it's like God is THERE. REALLY HE IS. as you sit there..and [THINK] you're stoning or being distracted by your problems and all...then thoughts come into your mind..thoughts that ease your mind..thoughts that seem to lift our burdens..amazingg powers of mass..so go for mass if you can people! i know i'm not the most frequent mass-goer but just wanted to share how God speaks to me during masses and i come out a changed person after that half an hour.
and OH. i noticed that day.
after communion, you see how quickly everyone falls to their knees to pray.
i just thought it just shows how we all can't wait to talk to God (:
oh anyway i just talked to my sister.
and i don't know. i just feel really happy. INNER INNER DEEP DEEP JOY (:
because she was sharing with me her experience in camp. just ONE DAY. ONE DAY. and. well. i can see how God's touched her. in ways quite similar to mine. and yes JOY. (:
i always wanted to go for retreat and i still want to.
and then i see how i'm watching the retreat from the outside.
how i see my sister be moved by God.
how i see my sister be moved by God THROUGH the participants.
how i can feel God right here NOW.
because i'm watching the retreat from afar.
COOL EH?
(:
praise You God.
and now i feel like crying.
that you know.
joyful crying.
i guess listening to her is like reliving my own first retreat.
and how i couldn't stop crying. for no apparent reason.
how i keep feeling these strong urges to do things that i wouldn't have done in normal circumstances.
how i keep listening to the pnw songs and just cried, and cried, and cried..seeing that light somewhere in front as i closed my eyes so tight and hugged my legs so close to myself..just listening..praying..praising God. and crying and crying..
and here i am now, telling the world of the wonders of God.
how HOW on earth could God have brought me so far
so CLOSE TO HIM.
to love HIm so.
and i really feel like crying now, not sure if any of the things above made snese to you all.
really long post anyway.
RICE.
Friday, June 16, 2006
“Life only starts after 50” A lot of people think that only when you have all the money and time in the word, will life truly begin. However for me, life began after confirmation. Today, I’m here to share my story…
In the past, if I could use 1 word to describe myself. It would be drifting. My life consisted of Sleep-School-Computer-Sleep. Repeat. Doesn’t that sound interesting? It might sound strange, but to some extent, I was contented with my life then.
I mean, my parents gave me all the freedom I wanted. I was under the radar in school. I earned friends by being good at a computer game. Most importantly, I had no problems in life right.
I have to tell you about catechism. I never liked it. Never had any friends in it. Hated waking up early. Hated having to miss Sunday cartoons. Infact, many a times, I used to just pon cathecism and go down to macs to eat and stone. I just covered up with a bunch of lies.
But eventually, my parents found out. And boy did they give me a trashing. They practically had to forced me to come for my confirmation retreat.
As it was in September, thinking that I was spending 30% of my holidays at this THING, was irritating. But, at the start of the camp. Someone said, participate. If not this retreat will mean nothing to you. And somehow. I did. I participated.
It was on the 2nd night of the retreat that something happened. A facil said, “Take a leap in faith and entrust everything to him. And you will experience a love so great. A love which will make your life hold.” What did taking a leap of faith mean? I thought back to my life and how empty it was at times. Have any of you watched Stuart Little? I had an empty space in my heart to.
Whom is that invisible man who can satisfy my every need.
Why not give it a chance.
I closed my eyes and I prayed. “God, I entrust my life in your hands.”
By the end of that session, I had a happiness which abounded through me like never before. What happened after was even more amazing. All fear inside me of talking to people vanished. Finally, I became friends with my cathecism classmates. I had a friend whom became a friend which I told everything to. From the crushed I had to the crap that I was facing in school.
That night, I was filled with courage and strength. Courage to do task which I never dreamed about and strength to finally reach out for more in life. I do not think my vocabulary is sufficient to describe the surge of emotions this very night years back.
This very event, keeps me wanting to know that man on the cross more. Eternal happiness was promised. And that feeling was so much more than everything that happened in my daily life.
My 180degree spin was then. Life became so much more meaningful. Relationships with friends and family grew stronger. Even my studies picked up. That strength and courage still follows me.
I realized what a blessing my family was. A gift from God they were. Though many a times we argued. I knew that my interest was always at the top of their mind. Home grew in warmth.
My friends in school were like, “Wow, what happened to you?” No longer was I shy. No longer was I bounded to having to impress my friends, as relationships grew deeper.
I started a youth community with other confirmants, who now support me through my life. Friends whom I trust with my life. Friends that I would sacrifice anything for. Friends that are united through one thing, Jesus Christ.
Indeed, taking a leap in faith. Trusting this man whom I never knew anything about with my thoughts, actions and being might sounds crazy. But now I realize so much more to life.
So much more Love in my life.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Grey seas, smoking driftwood, cold rains, misty hills, voices from afar.
Grey seas, smoking driftwood, cold rains, misty hills, voices from afar.
Lord, I pray with a heavy heart, seeking Thy love in my most sorrowful moment.
Lord I pray for my love one who has passed away. May he or she pass into Your undying Love & find fullness in You who alone can do so.
May I hold in my heart the hope that he will find peace, as I hold the same for myself when I come before You to be judge.
I seek comfort in You in my distress. Never let me lose hope!
In my darkness, let me not forget the deceased love ones too! I will try, as a faithful Christian, to support them.
Help me deal with the rigours of living without him, which all these I so often took for granted while he was in life.
Help me learn when & what to let go, & when & what to cling onto. Help me cherish those around me with the time I'm alloted.
People come & go in our lives, help me see in them Your Image. Give me the grace to cherish them as they should be, help them in their hour of need, wish them goodwill upon separation as a sign of my love for others. With the hope we'll meet in heaven.
Also, I pray that I'll mourn at the right time. Grief all I want now, but not any longer after for it'll stain the memory of my loved one & destroy my life.
With that, allow me to grow in understanding of others who are faced in similar situations, especially those struck with disaster. Help me pity them, feel with the victim's family & share in their sorrow.
In all, dedicate all that is spoken & unspoken to you Jesus Christ.
Amen.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
dear log,
thanks for comin down to my grandpa's wake last nite.. it really meant a lot to my family and i.. my mum kept commenting how nice it was that u all made the effort to come and support us, and we were all touched by ur presence. even for those who couldnt make it, ur prayers too have lifted both myself and my family greatly in this time of bereavement, so i thank u all sincerely on behalf of everyone for being so supportive and loving. i love u all lots (:
-justin
Saturday, June 10, 2006
Lover of my soul
can't be a drunkard any more...learning to love ya as i should be & loving my neighbours as you would want me to
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalallalalalalalalala
learning to be your child
taking you for my shephard and guide
sheilding me from harm
how could i had left you?
even then, you still bring me back, hug me and give me a kiss
who are you LOrd? the wonder of the universe
the one who created physics, chemistry,biology and maths
and taught us with a patient hand
wanting us to open your heart to us
living as a community
bring souls together
giving us peace in our unrest
lalalalalalalalalalala
lifting up our spirits when we're down
providing for our needs
giving us free will and we abuse it
then we ask why you allowed it though we did it
disasters strike
even then we can see your mercy in letting the survivors live to their fullest, carrying them through each painful day
why do we do otherwise?
hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
then we go back to you, away from you, back to you away from you
neverending cycle
through salvation end this wretched cycle
in Him we find our fullness
as one in Christ and Church
we love ya for all you've done...
our friends and families are living representatives of your love
i can't sleep
but i knwo you're with me
nevfer letting me go
counseling me to do the right thing
though it seems so hard
but you help me accept it
and with your grace i do your will
i've so much to type because Lord, your goodness is infinite
in the new jerusalem you set a pplace for me, waiting for my home coming
tears roll down my cheeks
and i say "Lord, when will it be the next time i sin? hurting you"
and HE replied "i'll be waiting for our reconciliation' with a big smile
then i wanted so much to hug him, and felt this warmness
ARRRRRRRRRR
I'll want to sing your praise forever, never letting your majesty be unveiled
in my smallness you're nevertheless glorified
you made us the only living beings to love freely
and you called us your masterpieces
and your greatest downfall when we fail to love
as shwon of a painful death on the cross
you shall never be more or less
endless boundaries are yours to shift
music & art you gave to soothe our burdened souls
on us you etched a unique mark
one nonetheless signifies our heirship
which we so often reject
goodness we are all called to
we answer as & when we feel like to
food from the soul you gave freely
you gave us your Son,
so that nothing can truely come between us but for ourselves
you love us
you saved us
uo healed us
you gave us life
you gave meaning to our lives which is YOU!
for you are my GOD!!!!
deep down in my heart!
:)
I LOVE YOU, JESUS!!!!!
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
turning back
finally, after centuries, decided to try my luck again. this time i got thru!! nv been able to get to the log blog page in the past. its a sign. shld post! haha. i'll make it a quick one. ok, so anyways, didnt come for the last 2 consecutive weeks of session before this sunday. and really started to feel withdrawn. and den went for swee's session. honestly, i cant really rmb anything cuz the atmosphere for session was really weird. the only thing i rmbed was swee saying 'take this leap of faith, stand up and trust in him' and i took it literally [like obviously]. den when i opened my eyes, oops. not meant to be literal. but den i realise, i have taken a leap of faith, i stood up and want to trust in him. its kinda significant for me, especially after whatever happened. which i dun think many pple know. no, its not my skool. very happy there. anyways, i know i need to turn back and im glad i have somewhere to turn back to. we gotta face facts. log's running into a bit of a problem here. but i have this new found hope in me tt somehow, in some way and definately, in god's time, everything will be alright. p.s. read the post below too `vonn
turning back
finally, after centuries, decided to try my luck again. this time i got thru!! nv been able to get to the log blog page in the past. its a sign. shld post! haha. i'll make it a quick one. ok, so anyways, didnt come for the last 2 consecutive weeks of session before this sunday. and really started to feel withdrawn. and den went for swee's session. honestly, i cant really rmb anything cuz the atmosphere for session was really weird. the only thing i rmbed was swee saying 'take this leap of faith, stand up and trust in him' and i took it literally [like obviously]. den when i opened my eyes, oops. not meant to be literal. but den i realise, i have taken a leap of faith, i stood up and want to trust in him. its kinda significant for me, especially after whatever happened. which i dun think many pple know. no, its not my skool. very happy there. anyways, i know i need to turn back and im glad i have somewhere to turn back to. we gotta face facts. log's running into a bit of a problem here. but i have this new found hope in me tt somehow, in some way and definately, in god's time, everything will be alright.
p.s. read the post below too
`vonn
Dear people
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
an interview with God =)
THE INTERVIEW WITH GOD
I dreamed I had an interview with God.
"So you would like to interview me?" God asked.
"If you have the time" I said.
God smiled. "My time is eternity."
"What questions do you have in mind for me?"
"What surprises you most about humankind?"
God answered...
"That they get bored with childhood,
they rush to grow up,
and then long to be children again."
"That they lose their health to make money...
and then lose their money to restore their health."
"That by thinking anxiously about the future,
they forget the present,
such that they live in neither
the present nor the future."
"That they live as if they will never die,
and die as though they had never lived."
God's hand took mine and we were silent for a while.
And then I asked...
"As a parent, what are some of life's lessons
you want your children to learn?"
"To learn they cannot make anyone love them.
All they can do is let themselves be loved."
"To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others."
"To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness."
"To learn that it only takes a few seconds
to open profound wounds in those they love,
and it can take many years to heal them."
"To learn that a rich person
is not one who has the most,
but is one who needs the least."
"To learn that there are people
who love them dearly,
but simply have not yet learned
how to express or show their feelings."
"To learn that two people
can look at the same thing
and see it differently."
"To learn that it is not enough
that they forgive one another,
but they must also forgive themselves."
"Thank you for your time," I said humbly.
"Is there anything else you would like your children to know?"
God smiled and said,
"Just know that I am here... always."
-author unknown
Monday, June 05, 2006
faith drove us.
today's session was reflective and solemn, yet somehow i think something good came out of it. what swee talked about today equaled to what i had been thinking of the past week or weeks. what we are today didn't come by our own might and power, but what we are today is created by the hands of god.
god knows us, he knows us when we sit and when we stand, he even knows the number of hairs on each of our heads, he knew us even before we were born. before confirmation, did we even picture ourselves being in this close community of kingdom builders, praying and working together for the glory of god? i doubt so. but then again, it was god who brought all of us together, the first ever LOG in this world. at the beginning it just seemed so weird, everyone seemed so divided, things looked so still and unmovable. why?
we live by faith, and not by sight.
and then, our community started to take off. some of us stepped out to lead, many of us discovered new gifts, gifts that we wouldn't have thought of possessing in the past. our barriers were breaking, our hearts were opening, our feet became more stable. faith. yes in all that we did, god made us believe in him, through each other. in the past, friends mattered alot, all that we were thinking about could have been just friends, and fun. but then god suddenly become more important in our lives, more important than anything else. we started to sacrifice time, space, effort not for the friends in our community, but for GOD in our community. for the love of jesus, for the love of god...
we are the LOG which god had put together.
we are the LOG which god had moulded and shaped.
we are the LOG which god had instilled faith in.
and we are the SAME LOG god will never give up on.
if god never gives up on us, why do we even think of giving up on this community, let alone giving up on ourselves?
people have changed, things have changed, feelings have changed. but one thing for sure will never change, and that is GOD'S LOVE. think back, for one year plus we've grown together as a community, grown in faith as well. what do you think drove us along this path we had chosen? friends? relationships? hobby? no. OUR LOVE FOR GOD is the thing that has been driving us. remember, all that we are doing is for god, for he is indeed the priority.
therefore we should question ourselves once again, why are we here? all the things that we have done, who have we done it for? are we taking each other for granted? are we taking god for granted? if god never gives up on us, why do we even think of giving up on this community, let alone giving up on ourselves? this is a cross he has given us to carry. and we must all carry it together, be it a sad cross, or a happy one. continue to support each other and continue to pray for each other everyday. we are on body in christ and a body with a single body part missing is not a body. we will go on. LOG, we will go on.
believe in him.
lalal
What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sin he bears
You shall walk in raging waters, but you shall not...
well, i don't have perfect recall unlike many of you, but i found it strange that it unconsciously came to mind. when i'm in distress, often songs come from nowhere and confort me. praise the Lord.
Well...TAKE COMFORT AND DRAW STRENGTH FROM THE LORD. hope in His unending love.
well..back to maths and the time's 6.02 am
0 Comments:
______________________________________________Monday, June 26, 2006
what a friend i've found, closer than a brother
i have felt your touch, more intimate than lovers.
jesus, jesus, jesus
friend forever.
what a hope i've found, more faithful than a mother.
it would break my heart, to ever lose each other.
jesus, jesus, jesus
friend forever.
hello log. (:
i must say that this holidays have been very enjoyable, we got to see each other more often than usual. (: it felt like last years hols. so thank you for the very enjoyable time i had.
so anyway today i was thinking in school, looking at the faces around me and i realised how (quote poey) insignificant they were. like what's the point of having so many friends when ihave my community leaven of god to actually show me the love of god! (: yeah then i awfully missed you guys. haha just so you know.
it would break my heart, to ever lose each other
kris <3>
and god loves log *10000000000000000000000000000 more.
0 Comments:
______________________________________________hello log (:
school's starting again.
and i must say while i was sitting there at the table at the reception after youth mass, i was thinking to myself..."when will i ever get to do this again"..and i just want to say that i really treasure all of you a lot. and i will miss you guys! as we all disappear to our busy lives once again.
just wanted to wish you all a happy school term ahead.
remember to pray.
and we all know that troubles [crosses] are going to come our way..
so continue to pray.
persevere...
and hopefully, soon enough i'll see ALL of you with smiley faces in sfx again. (:
i can't wait.
rice.
be not afraid
i go before you always
come follow me
and i will give you rest.
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______________________________________________Sunday, June 25, 2006
every step i take i take in you!
hello everybody. i want to share. so you better damn well listen.
you know the whole youth mass thing. i admit i havent paid attention to it much la. its like whatever im a small part of it i dont really care. yeah. like one of those passing things that you're just made to do. then when i realised i had to do the sharing i was like f**k it. i just really didnt want to do it but theres no avoiding it since i agreed right.
so i wrote it on saturday morning and emailed it to jon. like a rushed one because i thought i just had to write one and didnt have to give and father would pick. but not the case. found out later i had to give the testimonial. was like. screw.
so during halftime between sweden and germany i trudged upstairs to rewrite it (keep in mind i was really DAMN BLOODY ANGRY THAT SWEDEN WERE LOSING). then before i did it, i sat down to pray. i prayed for a change of heart and the strength and courage to give the testimonial. then i realised i was in no position to be angry. im writing a testimonial for god im giving a testimonial for god so whats the bloody point if god isnt the centre of my heart and god isnt my purpose?! there was no reason to give a testimonial about god if all thats on your mind is "why do i have to do this shit" so my mind just relaxed. and i really prayed for god to work his words in my testimonial and maybe he did because i changed the words and i put more heart into it.
then went to church at 9+ right? then the spiritual prep ( which i thought was really good btw i want to affirm them for the prep ) completely changed me. you know how before public speaking you always nervous and your heart is pounding hard into your ribcage andyou know you're gonna screw up? well the testimonial i wrote wasnt testimonial-ish so i was kinda worried. but after spiritual prep i knew the spirit was in the room and i didnt feel the panic. i just felt really peaceful and happy and my teeny-angst was gone
even during mass before testimonial time i wasnt particularly worried. like i knew i couldnt go wrong. by the time i reached the pulpit my heart stopped pounding and i just gave the testimonial. i dont know if it was like magical but it doesnt matter because if it touched even one person then the testimonial was meant especially for him/her.
so whats the moral of the story? you cannot win against god. the odds are stacked. when god gives you a purpose to do his work, you either do it for god or not do it at all, damit.
so i want to thank god for his guidance. i know it wasnt a great testimonial or something but it helped me to realise something. if you really do it for god your heart will rejoice because the spirit is moving within you.
then in the evening for no reason i just started singing that every step i take i take in you song. and im not a really p&w singing kinda person. so its a sign! lets take every step with god purposefully deservedly and joyfully.
and im sorry for calling all of you insignificant. i meant in-significant. like. all of you are a part of significance. something like that yah. good luck for common tests.
<3 poey
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______________________________________________Saturday, June 24, 2006
everything is made by God.
God does everything
for a
positive reason
no matter what.
-jes
-jes
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______________________________________________Friday, June 23, 2006
Stress is running high in many of us. i feel like i'm being torn apart by vhoosing what to do with my free time. well...all of us are feeling the strain.
tired. i'll like to sink my fingers onto the piano(guitar for many of you), drowning myself in music to escape the stresses. yet there's much to do.
imagination captures attention so easily. we would like to draw, create something new, our own.
well...take a break now
study tommorrow!!!! make sure you actually do it...
recharge or you'll burn out
in any case...don't spend he night without the appropriate amount of sleep
singing a lullaby
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______________________________________________Thursday, June 22, 2006
it's this thing called log love that i miss.
it's a feeling that i get when i think about log.
log love.
log love to me, it's like a warmness.
it's like that hot mug of frappachino after getting caught in the rain.
it's like that reassuring hug you get when you feel alone.
it's in that prayer you know is being said for you when youre most down.
it's in that familiar smile you get when you go to church after a lousy day at school.
it's that hand that pulls you up when you have a fall.
it's that shoulder to cry on.
it's that feeling that makes you feel special at the end of the day.
my own fault that i havent been around much for log, been busy with my own stuff. yeah that i know and im sorry.
we'll all catch up as one big family again, im sure God has set aside some time for that.
i love you log people.
God loves you log.
and God loves each and every single one of you so much.
He told me to tell you all that.
anne.
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______________________________________________Wednesday, June 21, 2006
9.10
Hi LoGgers~
It's half week before school starts again for some of us. When school starts, we'll be pretty much be busy again. What do you want to do with this time? 'cause we'll probably place school over Christ again. Plus, we need to study, prepare for the midyrs, ca, exams etc.
If you find it hard to study, say a silent, personal prayer whenever you're distracted. Make it short & simple.
Some times it's good to get out of old habbits. Take a leap of faith & persevere. thne you'll have found yourself change and grown a little.
when you're tired of studying move a little!
Struggles we go throuh seem alone, often not with friends or family. But the Lord walks each step of the time, & has the plan as Mark said. Never lose faith. Have HOPE! Christ is our hope, our light. Salvation will come to us. Many beutiful days are ahead.
Take care.
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______________________________________________Monday, June 19, 2006
Hey guys. I played a tournament over the weekend, thats y I missed the session. I can only see yall on youth mass! Anyway, even though I didn't go to SFX on sunday, I went to IHM for 7am mass before rushing to my tournament. I was feeling very shit bout stuff and really life looked bleak and bland. I cannot deny that suicide crossed my mind countless times but of course it is not the right thing to do at all. So I was just walking to IHM.. I felt that i was walking faster, I had this urge to reach church as soon as possible and pray. I needed to talk to God. This internal struggle was really very unbearable and uncomfortable. So I reached church, knelt down and suddenly I did not know wad to say. But I felt myself calm down, that heavy stone in my heart disappeared and I was feeling at peace. So mass started, it was corpus christi. In the reading, it described how Jesus commanded the disciples to prepare the passover. He had the plan in place, he just needed the disciples to carry it out. The house was ready with couches and all. Then Jesus broke the bread and drank the wine as well as the disciples then prepare himself for his suffering. He knew wad was gonna happen to him, definately afraid but he prayed for the strength. My own problems cannot hold a candle to his at all. So why was I doubting God's plan? If I knew about it, I might strive to change it and it will be even worse. For quite some time, I have resigned to trusting in Him and really not asking to know the plan that He has for me. Then it was coming to communion, I suddenly had this feeling of weariness. Life hasn't made me tired, I caused myself to worry and guess and become depressed over things that don't go my way. Tears welled up and I think it happens too often nowadays but yes, He is there to guide and help me. After all, I did the session on Trust in God, and yet I am struggling to come to terms to that. After the mass I just stayed in church, didn't bother rushing. I wanted to talk to God. Thank Him for wad he has done. Thank Him for being there. I felt so much better and I know there's so much more to life..
praise God!
mark
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______________________________________________Sunday, June 18, 2006
a priest once said
our lives are like a piece of patchwork.
while we are on earth, it looks like the back of the sewing. messed up and ugly.
but when we reach heaven,
just turn it around,
and you see a beautiful piece of art.
so persevere people.
our beautiful pieces of art are in the midst of creation.
rice.
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______________________________________________HELLO!
after reading swee's post i just felt like blogging.
it's been a long time actually.
oh well. i don't know. i just think it's amazing how one single testimony of God's love can touch everyone. ok..it touched me deeply. and so praise God! (: it's just amazing to see God's love work a "miracle"[so to say] in someone's life..and then i suddenly look at my own life and realise. God has worked COUNTLESS. and i mean COUNTLESS miracles in my life.
quoting one of mark's blog post in 2005
"we should always remember to thank the Lord for everything we receive in our daily lives because waking up in the morning is also a miracle!"
says it all really.
and we are all united in God. united by Jesus Christ. and that's why i can look at us and say. there's nothing that's going to be too devastating for us to conquer.Jesus Christ lives in all of us! and so. there's nothing too devastating that we can't conquer also.
as i plunge into my past again.
reliving those moments when i just felt SO SO SO hopeless. when i felt that this life is dreadful. my life is just one big dreadful mess that i can't be bothered to live anymore...and then i look at myself now..with this joy that i can so clearly feel inside me..and it's a joy that no other thing can give..only God..and then i realise. that it was worth it. PAIN for a joy that can penetrate your whole soul..your subconscious..your everything..your whole body, mind and soul. and i know the pain was worth it.
i just look forward to the day that i can see smiles again as much as you.
LOG. we've come a long way. though i wasn't with you guys since the beginning...it's amazing..it's just like one year..or slightly more than that? and i feel like i've known you guys for so much longer. and i love you guys so deeply. because of the God i can see so clearly ever working in everyone of you.
praise God. (:
i don't know what to say.
i just really wanted to post all of a sudden.
and you know. it's amazing how many answers you can find when you go for mass.
really. i didn't realise it until i thought about it. it's like God is THERE. REALLY HE IS. as you sit there..and [THINK] you're stoning or being distracted by your problems and all...then thoughts come into your mind..thoughts that ease your mind..thoughts that seem to lift our burdens..amazingg powers of mass..so go for mass if you can people! i know i'm not the most frequent mass-goer but just wanted to share how God speaks to me during masses and i come out a changed person after that half an hour.
and OH. i noticed that day.
after communion, you see how quickly everyone falls to their knees to pray.
i just thought it just shows how we all can't wait to talk to God (:
oh anyway i just talked to my sister.
and i don't know. i just feel really happy. INNER INNER DEEP DEEP JOY (:
because she was sharing with me her experience in camp. just ONE DAY. ONE DAY. and. well. i can see how God's touched her. in ways quite similar to mine. and yes JOY. (:
i always wanted to go for retreat and i still want to.
and then i see how i'm watching the retreat from the outside.
how i see my sister be moved by God.
how i see my sister be moved by God THROUGH the participants.
how i can feel God right here NOW.
because i'm watching the retreat from afar.
COOL EH?
(:
praise You God.
and now i feel like crying.
that you know.
joyful crying.
i guess listening to her is like reliving my own first retreat.
and how i couldn't stop crying. for no apparent reason.
how i keep feeling these strong urges to do things that i wouldn't have done in normal circumstances.
how i keep listening to the pnw songs and just cried, and cried, and cried..seeing that light somewhere in front as i closed my eyes so tight and hugged my legs so close to myself..just listening..praying..praising God. and crying and crying..
and here i am now, telling the world of the wonders of God.
how HOW on earth could God have brought me so far
so CLOSE TO HIM.
to love HIm so.
and i really feel like crying now, not sure if any of the things above made snese to you all.
really long post anyway.
RICE.
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______________________________________________Friday, June 16, 2006
“Life only starts after 50” A lot of people think that only when you have all the money and time in the word, will life truly begin. However for me, life began after confirmation. Today, I’m here to share my story…
In the past, if I could use 1 word to describe myself. It would be drifting. My life consisted of Sleep-School-Computer-Sleep. Repeat. Doesn’t that sound interesting? It might sound strange, but to some extent, I was contented with my life then.
I mean, my parents gave me all the freedom I wanted. I was under the radar in school. I earned friends by being good at a computer game. Most importantly, I had no problems in life right.
I have to tell you about catechism. I never liked it. Never had any friends in it. Hated waking up early. Hated having to miss Sunday cartoons. Infact, many a times, I used to just pon cathecism and go down to macs to eat and stone. I just covered up with a bunch of lies.
But eventually, my parents found out. And boy did they give me a trashing. They practically had to forced me to come for my confirmation retreat.
As it was in September, thinking that I was spending 30% of my holidays at this THING, was irritating. But, at the start of the camp. Someone said, participate. If not this retreat will mean nothing to you. And somehow. I did. I participated.
It was on the 2nd night of the retreat that something happened. A facil said, “Take a leap in faith and entrust everything to him. And you will experience a love so great. A love which will make your life hold.” What did taking a leap of faith mean? I thought back to my life and how empty it was at times. Have any of you watched Stuart Little? I had an empty space in my heart to.
Whom is that invisible man who can satisfy my every need.
Why not give it a chance.
I closed my eyes and I prayed. “God, I entrust my life in your hands.”
By the end of that session, I had a happiness which abounded through me like never before. What happened after was even more amazing. All fear inside me of talking to people vanished. Finally, I became friends with my cathecism classmates. I had a friend whom became a friend which I told everything to. From the crushed I had to the crap that I was facing in school.
That night, I was filled with courage and strength. Courage to do task which I never dreamed about and strength to finally reach out for more in life. I do not think my vocabulary is sufficient to describe the surge of emotions this very night years back.
This very event, keeps me wanting to know that man on the cross more. Eternal happiness was promised. And that feeling was so much more than everything that happened in my daily life.
My 180degree spin was then. Life became so much more meaningful. Relationships with friends and family grew stronger. Even my studies picked up. That strength and courage still follows me.
I realized what a blessing my family was. A gift from God they were. Though many a times we argued. I knew that my interest was always at the top of their mind. Home grew in warmth.
My friends in school were like, “Wow, what happened to you?” No longer was I shy. No longer was I bounded to having to impress my friends, as relationships grew deeper.
I started a youth community with other confirmants, who now support me through my life. Friends whom I trust with my life. Friends that I would sacrifice anything for. Friends that are united through one thing, Jesus Christ.
Indeed, taking a leap in faith. Trusting this man whom I never knew anything about with my thoughts, actions and being might sounds crazy. But now I realize so much more to life.
So much more Love in my life.
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______________________________________________Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Grey seas, smoking driftwood, cold rains, misty hills, voices from afar.
Grey seas, smoking driftwood, cold rains, misty hills, voices from afar.
Lord, I pray with a heavy heart, seeking Thy love in my most sorrowful moment.
Lord I pray for my love one who has passed away. May he or she pass into Your undying Love & find fullness in You who alone can do so.
May I hold in my heart the hope that he will find peace, as I hold the same for myself when I come before You to be judge.
I seek comfort in You in my distress. Never let me lose hope!
In my darkness, let me not forget the deceased love ones too! I will try, as a faithful Christian, to support them.
Help me deal with the rigours of living without him, which all these I so often took for granted while he was in life.
Help me learn when & what to let go, & when & what to cling onto. Help me cherish those around me with the time I'm alloted.
People come & go in our lives, help me see in them Your Image. Give me the grace to cherish them as they should be, help them in their hour of need, wish them goodwill upon separation as a sign of my love for others. With the hope we'll meet in heaven.
Also, I pray that I'll mourn at the right time. Grief all I want now, but not any longer after for it'll stain the memory of my loved one & destroy my life.
With that, allow me to grow in understanding of others who are faced in similar situations, especially those struck with disaster. Help me pity them, feel with the victim's family & share in their sorrow.
In all, dedicate all that is spoken & unspoken to you Jesus Christ.
Amen.
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______________________________________________Tuesday, June 13, 2006
dear log,
thanks for comin down to my grandpa's wake last nite.. it really meant a lot to my family and i.. my mum kept commenting how nice it was that u all made the effort to come and support us, and we were all touched by ur presence. even for those who couldnt make it, ur prayers too have lifted both myself and my family greatly in this time of bereavement, so i thank u all sincerely on behalf of everyone for being so supportive and loving. i love u all lots (:
-justin
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______________________________________________Saturday, June 10, 2006
Lover of my soul
can't be a drunkard any more...learning to love ya as i should be & loving my neighbours as you would want me to
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalallalalalalalalala
learning to be your child
taking you for my shephard and guide
sheilding me from harm
how could i had left you?
even then, you still bring me back, hug me and give me a kiss
who are you LOrd? the wonder of the universe
the one who created physics, chemistry,biology and maths
and taught us with a patient hand
wanting us to open your heart to us
living as a community
bring souls together
giving us peace in our unrest
lalalalalalalalalalala
lifting up our spirits when we're down
providing for our needs
giving us free will and we abuse it
then we ask why you allowed it though we did it
disasters strike
even then we can see your mercy in letting the survivors live to their fullest, carrying them through each painful day
why do we do otherwise?
hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
then we go back to you, away from you, back to you away from you
neverending cycle
through salvation end this wretched cycle
in Him we find our fullness
as one in Christ and Church
we love ya for all you've done...
our friends and families are living representatives of your love
i can't sleep
but i knwo you're with me
nevfer letting me go
counseling me to do the right thing
though it seems so hard
but you help me accept it
and with your grace i do your will
i've so much to type because Lord, your goodness is infinite
in the new jerusalem you set a pplace for me, waiting for my home coming
tears roll down my cheeks
and i say "Lord, when will it be the next time i sin? hurting you"
and HE replied "i'll be waiting for our reconciliation' with a big smile
then i wanted so much to hug him, and felt this warmness
ARRRRRRRRRR
I'll want to sing your praise forever, never letting your majesty be unveiled
in my smallness you're nevertheless glorified
you made us the only living beings to love freely
and you called us your masterpieces
and your greatest downfall when we fail to love
as shwon of a painful death on the cross
you shall never be more or less
endless boundaries are yours to shift
music & art you gave to soothe our burdened souls
on us you etched a unique mark
one nonetheless signifies our heirship
which we so often reject
goodness we are all called to
we answer as & when we feel like to
food from the soul you gave freely
you gave us your Son,
so that nothing can truely come between us but for ourselves
you love us
you saved us
uo healed us
you gave us life
you gave meaning to our lives which is YOU!
for you are my GOD!!!!
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______________________________________________deep down in my heart!
:)
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______________________________________________I LOVE YOU, JESUS!!!!!
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______________________________________________Wednesday, June 07, 2006
turning back
finally, after centuries, decided to try my luck again. this time i got thru!! nv been able to get to the log blog page in the past. its a sign. shld post! haha. i'll make it a quick one. ok, so anyways, didnt come for the last 2 consecutive weeks of session before this sunday. and really started to feel withdrawn. and den went for swee's session. honestly, i cant really rmb anything cuz the atmosphere for session was really weird. the only thing i rmbed was swee saying 'take this leap of faith, stand up and trust in him' and i took it literally [like obviously]. den when i opened my eyes, oops. not meant to be literal. but den i realise, i have taken a leap of faith, i stood up and want to trust in him. its kinda significant for me, especially after whatever happened. which i dun think many pple know. no, its not my skool. very happy there. anyways, i know i need to turn back and im glad i have somewhere to turn back to. we gotta face facts. log's running into a bit of a problem here. but i have this new found hope in me tt somehow, in some way and definately, in god's time, everything will be alright. p.s. read the post below too `vonn
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______________________________________________turning back
finally, after centuries, decided to try my luck again. this time i got thru!! nv been able to get to the log blog page in the past. its a sign. shld post! haha. i'll make it a quick one. ok, so anyways, didnt come for the last 2 consecutive weeks of session before this sunday. and really started to feel withdrawn. and den went for swee's session. honestly, i cant really rmb anything cuz the atmosphere for session was really weird. the only thing i rmbed was swee saying 'take this leap of faith, stand up and trust in him' and i took it literally [like obviously]. den when i opened my eyes, oops. not meant to be literal. but den i realise, i have taken a leap of faith, i stood up and want to trust in him. its kinda significant for me, especially after whatever happened. which i dun think many pple know. no, its not my skool. very happy there. anyways, i know i need to turn back and im glad i have somewhere to turn back to. we gotta face facts. log's running into a bit of a problem here. but i have this new found hope in me tt somehow, in some way and definately, in god's time, everything will be alright.
p.s. read the post below too
`vonn
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______________________________________________Dear people
Before i start, i would like to say how i feel.
I'm getting more detached from the world as it is. closing up as i once did. It took me 7(funny number) years to start reopening. In my trials alone, however, God seems always to be with me, calming me in my distress. Yet, as it seems, my time with you all maybe short as, well, i'm getting tired. Plus, i seem very different from all of you.
Back to the post proper...
We have many expectations from others, ourselves and not forgetting God. Can we meet all these expectations with our finite time and energy? Probably not. Some times, others expect us not to be so "extra". Well, do what you want, but be accountable and do with a purpose. That's why God gave us free will. Our 1st priority is to God, after that i'm not sure. But we do have a duty to ourselves. We have to give of ourselves us Catholics, well, how else you show God's and your love? Then will seem extra.
Next, we shouldn't have to tolerate what seems as sinful and evil. Not doing so means you endorse such an activity. It also desensitises ourselves from what is morally wrong. over time, it may seem correct to us. But do it in a respectable way which is not hurtful. To me, stating my objections and not participating seems a weak way. We should stop it if it's potentially destructive in nature to the soul. i believe that it's up to you in the end.
cini
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______________________________________________Tuesday, June 06, 2006
an interview with God =)
THE INTERVIEW WITH GOD
I dreamed I had an interview with God.
"So you would like to interview me?" God asked.
"If you have the time" I said.
God smiled. "My time is eternity."
"What questions do you have in mind for me?"
"What surprises you most about humankind?"
God answered...
"That they get bored with childhood,
they rush to grow up,
and then long to be children again."
"That they lose their health to make money...
and then lose their money to restore their health."
"That by thinking anxiously about the future,
they forget the present,
such that they live in neither
the present nor the future."
"That they live as if they will never die,
and die as though they had never lived."
God's hand took mine and we were silent for a while.
And then I asked...
"As a parent, what are some of life's lessons
you want your children to learn?"
"To learn they cannot make anyone love them.
All they can do is let themselves be loved."
"To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others."
"To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness."
"To learn that it only takes a few seconds
to open profound wounds in those they love,
and it can take many years to heal them."
"To learn that a rich person
is not one who has the most,
but is one who needs the least."
"To learn that there are people
who love them dearly,
but simply have not yet learned
how to express or show their feelings."
"To learn that two people
can look at the same thing
and see it differently."
"To learn that it is not enough
that they forgive one another,
but they must also forgive themselves."
"Thank you for your time," I said humbly.
"Is there anything else you would like your children to know?"
God smiled and said,
"Just know that I am here... always."
-author unknown
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______________________________________________Monday, June 05, 2006
faith drove us.
today's session was reflective and solemn, yet somehow i think something good came out of it. what swee talked about today equaled to what i had been thinking of the past week or weeks. what we are today didn't come by our own might and power, but what we are today is created by the hands of god.
god knows us, he knows us when we sit and when we stand, he even knows the number of hairs on each of our heads, he knew us even before we were born. before confirmation, did we even picture ourselves being in this close community of kingdom builders, praying and working together for the glory of god? i doubt so. but then again, it was god who brought all of us together, the first ever LOG in this world. at the beginning it just seemed so weird, everyone seemed so divided, things looked so still and unmovable. why?
we live by faith, and not by sight.
and then, our community started to take off. some of us stepped out to lead, many of us discovered new gifts, gifts that we wouldn't have thought of possessing in the past. our barriers were breaking, our hearts were opening, our feet became more stable. faith. yes in all that we did, god made us believe in him, through each other. in the past, friends mattered alot, all that we were thinking about could have been just friends, and fun. but then god suddenly become more important in our lives, more important than anything else. we started to sacrifice time, space, effort not for the friends in our community, but for GOD in our community. for the love of jesus, for the love of god...
we are the LOG which god had put together.
we are the LOG which god had moulded and shaped.
we are the LOG which god had instilled faith in.
and we are the SAME LOG god will never give up on.
if god never gives up on us, why do we even think of giving up on this community, let alone giving up on ourselves?
people have changed, things have changed, feelings have changed. but one thing for sure will never change, and that is GOD'S LOVE. think back, for one year plus we've grown together as a community, grown in faith as well. what do you think drove us along this path we had chosen? friends? relationships? hobby? no. OUR LOVE FOR GOD is the thing that has been driving us. remember, all that we are doing is for god, for he is indeed the priority.
therefore we should question ourselves once again, why are we here? all the things that we have done, who have we done it for? are we taking each other for granted? are we taking god for granted? if god never gives up on us, why do we even think of giving up on this community, let alone giving up on ourselves? this is a cross he has given us to carry. and we must all carry it together, be it a sad cross, or a happy one. continue to support each other and continue to pray for each other everyday. we are on body in christ and a body with a single body part missing is not a body. we will go on. LOG, we will go on.
believe in him.