Thursday, January 24, 2008
Hello jon, brandon and log girls, I am going in! Keep me in your prayers! and also that i don't slack too much inside.
for the guys that will read this this weekend, hope you did go to church! and praise God that He kept yall safe.
see yall at chinese new year!
mark
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
its me again!
homily today struck me.
went to church after a dismal interview, it really disheartened me because hopes of me getting into hotel school were dented. i be truthful, one half of me wants to go overseas and experience it. the other half strongly says no, i want to stay in Singapore to be with my family, friends and LOGGERS =). the options in Singapore are also very attractive you see. but more often than not, i find myself missing the whole point. eventually i wan to contribute to the world, earn money and do my part for the less fortunate. so as long i reach there eventually, any path will do and it is where the Lord will lead me.
so first reading. samuel was supposed to annoit God's chosen one, one of Jesse's sons. Jesse had 8 sons but he only presented 7 to samuel. God told Samuel that the 7 weren't the ones he chose. So Samuel asked Jesse whether he had another son. Jesse said yes, he was out in the fields, shepherding sheep. So Jesse sent for him, and he was David, the chosen one. After which David became king and all and as you go down the family line, to Mary which then conceived Jesus! So such a plan is so complex and so complete. ok it reinforced my belief that God plans well for us, we just gotta have faith.
then gospel, was another case of how the Pharisees tried to trap Jesus on a Sabbath day. It was indeed ironic that on a Sabbath, a day of rest, the Pharisees were doing something (trailing Jesus) and trying to trap him, and then accuse Jesus of violating the rules of the Sabbath. Mark's gospel then mentions Jesus proclaiming his authority and gives a new insight. He says that the Sabbath is made for men and not men made for the Sabbath so the priority of men comes before the Sabbath. on top of that, Jesus, the Son of man is above the Sabbath. As we infer through this passage, we replace the Sabbath with days, with the world. The world is made FOR men, for us to experience all kinds of emotions, trials so much so that at the end of the day, if we still have faith in the Lord, we are rewarded with eternity with Him in heaven. So men should not try to conform to the world, be chained to the needs of the world and the expectations. Only God sees us truly and judges us. God is above the world because he is the creator.
Picture this. you bring yourself into a third person perspective looking at yourself, your actions, your intentions and your thoughts. You will know the person you are observing (yourself) through and through. This is how judgement will be.
so combining both the first reading and the gospel, we how the whole BIG plan God has made. The world is made for us. Yesterday's final hymn was thank you Lord. I loved that song because of its lyrics. Of how we thank the Lord for the trials and how we grow from these trials. We learn to trust and to find patience. Human nature forbids us to let the Spirit guide but as long as we step back and take a wider perspective we will see where the Spirit is guiding us.
thank you Lord
Mark
Monday, January 21, 2008
von had a bad bad day.
think im gonna fail the stupid quiz i took this morning, and tt covered like some 10%. and then i forgot to bring my lab coat today. thank god zach didnt have lab so i could borrow his. just came home from a meeting where my assistants and i got shot down like mad. but then again, it has always been like that. ntg new there. you either defend and then get rebutted even more, or shut up and just take it in. den the final blow came when i sat down to open my emails. two of my programmers want to quit.
am i not good enough or what. didnt i say i want commitment. but for the life of me, i couldnt let out anything. it just felt numb. it wasnt surprising anyway.
until i happen to pass by log blog and i saw 'swee's post'. yep, swee did it. made me sob like crazy. im not in tekong, but i might as well be. cuz i also, cling to log like anything. i know its only monday but i miss log like everyday, even the girls pls. everytime i gotta step into the lounge, i think of the painful politics i might face. den i think of log, and how you guys are the ones who know how to love unconditionally. and tt gives me strength to walk into tt room to love others unconditionally. cuz im part of log too.
at this stage in my life, i've nv felt further away from god ever. its like i've neglected him so much, i just wanna get the stuff in school over and done with so i can go back for good. so i stray even more. i dont pray. cuz im not fit to even talk to god. i can get thru this 'by myself', just until it all ends in april/may.
so pray for me. cuz you and i both know i cannot do this alone.
am i the only one who's traded
in the altar for the stage
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
From Swee:
Hey log, army life hasn't been the best, i'd call it f-ed up, but i'm trying not to swear. But gosh i just want to vent my emotions. I miss you all so damn much... I swear log is the thing i cling to the most. Today, liver told me that merger is confirmed (it is?), and i almost broke down into tears. Or actually i did. I was broken, and it didnt help that we well falling in.(i dunno what he means here) For the girls, I'm sure all the guys miss you all, thanks for the evening you planned. You all give me a pillar to depend on. For the guys, stay strong, pray more, We'll get through it together. God bless.
the thing in brackets is me! hope all you are doing fine. maybe we'll have a log girls night out soon or something k! (: pray for the guys! putting a bunch of males alone on an island results in a lot of vulgar language. haha
cheers!
-jes
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Mark:
Here I am, the remaining guy yet to go in. Together with jon and brandon, we'll be the guys yall will only meet for a while. Haha.
Decided to visit this blog and surprised to see 2 "new" entries lol coz last time i visited was before i went into a's mugging. time flies doesn't it.
i went to church early today before weekday mass to go ado room and find some peace. All i saw was a cloudy future of myself. its tough getting out of school. school had structure, plans, schedules made for us. now we have to find our own agenda. i see paths in front of me yet scared to choose them.
i wan to study hotel administration which means i will need to go overseas. met colin on the bus that day and what he said struck me. going overseas = no community. or rather, i'll meet yall as much as i meet my family every year for 4 years. 4 years is a long long time. so is the 2 years in army.
my dad has passive leukemia and it ain't wise for me to leave Singapore either.
so what do i do. i wan to help this world, the people who are poor, sick and yearning to be loved. to make a significant difference to many, i need the money. i need to earn it or set up a company that can fund any of these projects to help these people. i need to pursue something that will lead me there. so where do i go? i need to see the pieces of puzzle fit before i make my decision.
I am struggling with my faith now. blame it on too much exposure to logical arguments with my friends. tried to remedy it by borrowing some books from the library. after i read, i am sure i will have something to share. it is tough to be around friends, my cca mates, who are just cynical about christianity and faith. I understand their thinking and i also understand my own. I can see where they are coming from as well. I just gotta let faith take over, and not logic.
rmb that time when jude asked me why I joined LOG. I said I wanted to join a group of people whom i can journey in faith with. so comes youth forum and the idea of a merger. basis of which is because the mission of the groups are similar, so why don't combine the effort. i don't see it this way. each group are at different stages of faith and combining will mean we start all over again, getting used to each other. so our faith stagnants? i think all it needs is to have a more structured youth ministry with one mission. then leave the youth groups alone because there are there for faith journeys together. i think if merger happens, many will leave, i think i might.
God bless.
Mark
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
if i think hard enough, i just might start crying now. log guys are going NS. yea, seems like a stupid reason huh? dont laugh you guys. i know you guys not gonna die or anything [boy, does von love talking abt dying] but its just that, i wont be seeing yall so often as i'ld love to. and i wont be able to do sessions, even worst when yall in tekong or some ulu pandan place. and mission trip/log bonding just made it worst lah. and gen says guys who go to NS will stray and all. and im damn scared now.
i know that tml, the moment i step into school, i'll chiong all the way already. and the next big break that im gonna get is far away in april, after all the orientation stuff. im scared that by the time i go back, log wont be there any more.
so i keep thinking of justin's dream, of how we'll still be at RK eating prata as log, at 30 yrs old. and how soo says kong is damn holy. so his dream must be true.
i just hope everything i've gained from the 5 days in thailand can get me thru the next 4-5 months. its not gonna be easy. but im gonna do it. and i hope, if i can make it back after 4-5 months, the guys will not give up thruout the 2 yrs. that's whats community is for isnt it?
damn. i feel more emo now than when we left the kids at Lorenzo home.
'can we go down now?' -laughs thru the tears-
Hello jon, brandon and log girls, I am going in! Keep me in your prayers! and also that i don't slack too much inside.
for the guys that will read this this weekend, hope you did go to church! and praise God that He kept yall safe.
see yall at chinese new year!
mark
0 Comments:
______________________________________________Tuesday, January 22, 2008
its me again!
homily today struck me.
went to church after a dismal interview, it really disheartened me because hopes of me getting into hotel school were dented. i be truthful, one half of me wants to go overseas and experience it. the other half strongly says no, i want to stay in Singapore to be with my family, friends and LOGGERS =). the options in Singapore are also very attractive you see. but more often than not, i find myself missing the whole point. eventually i wan to contribute to the world, earn money and do my part for the less fortunate. so as long i reach there eventually, any path will do and it is where the Lord will lead me.
so first reading. samuel was supposed to annoit God's chosen one, one of Jesse's sons. Jesse had 8 sons but he only presented 7 to samuel. God told Samuel that the 7 weren't the ones he chose. So Samuel asked Jesse whether he had another son. Jesse said yes, he was out in the fields, shepherding sheep. So Jesse sent for him, and he was David, the chosen one. After which David became king and all and as you go down the family line, to Mary which then conceived Jesus! So such a plan is so complex and so complete. ok it reinforced my belief that God plans well for us, we just gotta have faith.
then gospel, was another case of how the Pharisees tried to trap Jesus on a Sabbath day. It was indeed ironic that on a Sabbath, a day of rest, the Pharisees were doing something (trailing Jesus) and trying to trap him, and then accuse Jesus of violating the rules of the Sabbath. Mark's gospel then mentions Jesus proclaiming his authority and gives a new insight. He says that the Sabbath is made for men and not men made for the Sabbath so the priority of men comes before the Sabbath. on top of that, Jesus, the Son of man is above the Sabbath. As we infer through this passage, we replace the Sabbath with days, with the world. The world is made FOR men, for us to experience all kinds of emotions, trials so much so that at the end of the day, if we still have faith in the Lord, we are rewarded with eternity with Him in heaven. So men should not try to conform to the world, be chained to the needs of the world and the expectations. Only God sees us truly and judges us. God is above the world because he is the creator.
Picture this. you bring yourself into a third person perspective looking at yourself, your actions, your intentions and your thoughts. You will know the person you are observing (yourself) through and through. This is how judgement will be.
so combining both the first reading and the gospel, we how the whole BIG plan God has made. The world is made for us. Yesterday's final hymn was thank you Lord. I loved that song because of its lyrics. Of how we thank the Lord for the trials and how we grow from these trials. We learn to trust and to find patience. Human nature forbids us to let the Spirit guide but as long as we step back and take a wider perspective we will see where the Spirit is guiding us.
thank you Lord
Mark
0 Comments:
______________________________________________Monday, January 21, 2008
von had a bad bad day.
think im gonna fail the stupid quiz i took this morning, and tt covered like some 10%. and then i forgot to bring my lab coat today. thank god zach didnt have lab so i could borrow his. just came home from a meeting where my assistants and i got shot down like mad. but then again, it has always been like that. ntg new there. you either defend and then get rebutted even more, or shut up and just take it in. den the final blow came when i sat down to open my emails. two of my programmers want to quit.
am i not good enough or what. didnt i say i want commitment. but for the life of me, i couldnt let out anything. it just felt numb. it wasnt surprising anyway.
until i happen to pass by log blog and i saw 'swee's post'. yep, swee did it. made me sob like crazy. im not in tekong, but i might as well be. cuz i also, cling to log like anything. i know its only monday but i miss log like everyday, even the girls pls. everytime i gotta step into the lounge, i think of the painful politics i might face. den i think of log, and how you guys are the ones who know how to love unconditionally. and tt gives me strength to walk into tt room to love others unconditionally. cuz im part of log too.
at this stage in my life, i've nv felt further away from god ever. its like i've neglected him so much, i just wanna get the stuff in school over and done with so i can go back for good. so i stray even more. i dont pray. cuz im not fit to even talk to god. i can get thru this 'by myself', just until it all ends in april/may.
so pray for me. cuz you and i both know i cannot do this alone.
am i the only one who's traded
in the altar for the stage
0 Comments:
______________________________________________Wednesday, January 16, 2008
From Swee:
Hey log, army life hasn't been the best, i'd call it f-ed up, but i'm trying not to swear. But gosh i just want to vent my emotions. I miss you all so damn much... I swear log is the thing i cling to the most. Today, liver told me that merger is confirmed (it is?), and i almost broke down into tears. Or actually i did. I was broken, and it didnt help that we well falling in.(i dunno what he means here) For the girls, I'm sure all the guys miss you all, thanks for the evening you planned. You all give me a pillar to depend on. For the guys, stay strong, pray more, We'll get through it together. God bless.
the thing in brackets is me! hope all you are doing fine. maybe we'll have a log girls night out soon or something k! (: pray for the guys! putting a bunch of males alone on an island results in a lot of vulgar language. haha
cheers!
-jes
0 Comments:
______________________________________________Thursday, January 10, 2008
Mark:
Here I am, the remaining guy yet to go in. Together with jon and brandon, we'll be the guys yall will only meet for a while. Haha.
Decided to visit this blog and surprised to see 2 "new" entries lol coz last time i visited was before i went into a's mugging. time flies doesn't it.
i went to church early today before weekday mass to go ado room and find some peace. All i saw was a cloudy future of myself. its tough getting out of school. school had structure, plans, schedules made for us. now we have to find our own agenda. i see paths in front of me yet scared to choose them.
i wan to study hotel administration which means i will need to go overseas. met colin on the bus that day and what he said struck me. going overseas = no community. or rather, i'll meet yall as much as i meet my family every year for 4 years. 4 years is a long long time. so is the 2 years in army.
my dad has passive leukemia and it ain't wise for me to leave Singapore either.
so what do i do. i wan to help this world, the people who are poor, sick and yearning to be loved. to make a significant difference to many, i need the money. i need to earn it or set up a company that can fund any of these projects to help these people. i need to pursue something that will lead me there. so where do i go? i need to see the pieces of puzzle fit before i make my decision.
I am struggling with my faith now. blame it on too much exposure to logical arguments with my friends. tried to remedy it by borrowing some books from the library. after i read, i am sure i will have something to share. it is tough to be around friends, my cca mates, who are just cynical about christianity and faith. I understand their thinking and i also understand my own. I can see where they are coming from as well. I just gotta let faith take over, and not logic.
rmb that time when jude asked me why I joined LOG. I said I wanted to join a group of people whom i can journey in faith with. so comes youth forum and the idea of a merger. basis of which is because the mission of the groups are similar, so why don't combine the effort. i don't see it this way. each group are at different stages of faith and combining will mean we start all over again, getting used to each other. so our faith stagnants? i think all it needs is to have a more structured youth ministry with one mission. then leave the youth groups alone because there are there for faith journeys together. i think if merger happens, many will leave, i think i might.
God bless.
Mark
0 Comments:
______________________________________________Wednesday, January 02, 2008
if i think hard enough, i just might start crying now. log guys are going NS. yea, seems like a stupid reason huh? dont laugh you guys. i know you guys not gonna die or anything [boy, does von love talking abt dying] but its just that, i wont be seeing yall so often as i'ld love to. and i wont be able to do sessions, even worst when yall in tekong or some ulu pandan place. and mission trip/log bonding just made it worst lah. and gen says guys who go to NS will stray and all. and im damn scared now.
i know that tml, the moment i step into school, i'll chiong all the way already. and the next big break that im gonna get is far away in april, after all the orientation stuff. im scared that by the time i go back, log wont be there any more.
so i keep thinking of justin's dream, of how we'll still be at RK eating prata as log, at 30 yrs old. and how soo says kong is damn holy. so his dream must be true.
i just hope everything i've gained from the 5 days in thailand can get me thru the next 4-5 months. its not gonna be easy. but im gonna do it. and i hope, if i can make it back after 4-5 months, the guys will not give up thruout the 2 yrs. that's whats community is for isnt it?
damn. i feel more emo now than when we left the kids at Lorenzo home.
'can we go down now?' -laughs thru the tears-